Mourning Dove

There's a little dove that built a nest in the parking ramp where I work. Every day I drove by her and she cocked her head at me, looking sidelong for signs of danger. Her nest was tucked under a little metal wire and it looked as cozy as a concrete haven six stories above downtown could be.

When I'd walk to the elevator I pass a little closer to get a look. I knew she must be sitting on eggs, given that she was there every day when I came to work and when I left.

Yesterday, two eggs, one perfectly constructed nest. No mama bird. I thought, well, maybe she's gotta go get food, but I felt that uneasy roil in my stomach. Left work: two eggs, perfectly constructed nest, no mama.

Today, more of the same. I wonder what happened to mama bird. Is she hurt? Dead? Did she abandon the nest? Did some dumb human touch those eggs and drive mama away with their human smell?

I know the world probably doesn't need another mourning dove. But I do wonder what drove mama from the nest. I felt tears prick the backs of my eyes for those two perfectly round, white eggs.


Wow. So that's the longest break I've ever taken, I think and it's not like I made a Jay-Z-like comeback. Things continue to be chaotic. There are a lot of changes coming down the pike (all good, and no, not a baby) and both the willi and the kat are just barely keeping our heads above water. I promise more will be revealed soon.

Updates

I keep trying to write someting here tonight and I just.can't.do.it.

So much to say, feeling so addled, so much I should be doing instead.

This week was a big week. My talented hubby was the Etsy featured seller, featured on decor8 (one of my fave design blogs), and in Budget Travel magazine. Right now the soundtrack to our lives is the packing tape ripping off the roll, accidentally stepping on bubble wrap (gunshot-like), and sandpaper.

But I truly could not be prouder of my husband. He's so talented, and he deserves all the success that comes his way.

Baby Momo is having a bad week. Er, she was until we got her on some professional-grade painkillers and muscle relaxers. Poor dog wants to be just like her mom, so she went and got some spasms in her back. Very painful. It's a sign of her aging and very hard for me to accept. Even worse was the fact that as I hoisted her (as carefully as possible) into the car, she cried out in such pain—I've never heard her make that noise before. And then she shook on her seat as I drove her to the vet, bawling myself, carefully trying not to hit any potholes (good luck with that in springtime MN). but now she's just like all the A-list celebs and pumped full of good pills.

I'm treading water. I'm so excited about some of the possibilities that lie ahead with my New Thing, but right now I'm just trying to stay afloat. Soon, tough, it should be smooth sailing.

Will y'all still be my friends? I'm trying to keep up with you all, even if I am not writing as much as I'd like.

Thinking on Thirty.

I've been thinking a lot lately about the fact that I'm nearly halfway through my 29th year. Like, I'm going to be THIRTY.

I'm not that worried about turning THIRTY other than it's a new decade and it sounds a little foreign to my ears. The last couple decades rang in with fanfare, with the idea that I'm still young forever. Young but with new, exciting realities. Thirty sort of means something different, doesn't it, even when you're not necessarily afraid of getting old? It has a heft and weight to it. THIRTY!

Thirty is when I thought I'd finally be taken seriously. And as my mom will attest, I thought I was thirty by the time I was probably four. I had no time for childlike bullshit, except for when I thought childhood bullshit was VERY SERIOUS. Which was every day.

But here I am, on the precipice of thirty. Or at least thinking about what I need to do with the last remaining months of my "frivolous" 20s.

But if thirty isn't a big deal, then why think about it, right? In some ways, I think of it as turning the page. I've laid a lot of groundwork in my life. College, jobs, the loft, Molly, getting married. I guess the 20s weren't quite that frivolous after all. (Well—maybe bits from 20-23.)

I don't know. I guess what I'm thinking is that I don't feel like thirty. I don't feel like 29! Good thing. I hear you're only as old as you feel.

What did you want to accomplish before 30? Did you worry? What was the result?

Braindead

You guys. My brain is dead. Fried. Gone.

So much to do, so little time.

I need more clarity in my thoughts. Even though I just had a three-week vacation. Got any hints?

Day One: Done

The thing about New Things is, the first day is always hard. So much to know and feeling out of your element.

About halfway through the day, though, two familiar--and quite beautiful--heads popped up over the wall of one of those podlike things where you sit when you have a New Thing. I was so happy to see them, and the one other familiar person joined us for lunch. Thanks, friends. It went a looong way in making me feel more comfortable today.

The only hiccup? Losing my car in the ramp despite the fact that I texted myself my location before I left. Idiot. But I found it! And all is well.

And now I'm exhausted from the Change in Things. Just thought I'd update.

New Things

William and I have been abundantly lucky in the last couple of months. We have had so many New Things. New experiences, new environments, new opportunities (and I got a new car). There's a lot to be said there, but I have just been so out of it. And so much has been happening, I haven't had time to fully process it all.

I've read that quote about "The harder I work, the luckier I get." I have to wonder in our case if at least there is some truth to that. I see how hard we work each week and how much passion we have for our careers and making our lives together the best they can be. There's also timing, and being in the right place.

Lately it feels like both of us are in the right place. Just so many pieces are falling into place right now. It feels exhilarating.

One these New Things happens tomorrow for me. It's one of those things We Do Not Blog About, lest we get Dooced. But let's just say a 30% off coupon to Banana Republic was well-timed, because I'm having to upgrade the wardrobe a little bit. For tomorrow and for the foreseeable future.

It's kind of one of those one-in-a-lifetime New Things. I'm really psyched. Wish me luck.

Jet Lag

I hate to complain about such a first-world problem, but people: I am JET LAGGED.

I thought I'd just have my days and nights mixed up a little bit and it would be No Big Deal after like two days.

But like three days have gone by and I've been in a fog for all three of them. It's all I can do to get up, get dressed, report to work. I can't focus, all I can think of is sleep, when I'm not being distracted by some other distant, foggy thought in my head.

Once I can get my thoughts together I am planning on recapping the trip, quite extensively. Wm shot tons and tons of photos and those will be here too.